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14 Apr 2018

Shameless Kenyan Man Narrates How Prostitutes Suck His Mjulubeng! In Mlolongo

Mlolongo town is famed for its ‘great activities. Referred by many as red district area, Mlolongo is packed with prostitutes where many go to quench their thirsts and I’m sure if you’re a city resident, you’ve heard a lot of tales about the small town.

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Well, a Kenyan man has praised Mlolongo and he says, there’s a lot it offers more than sex.
He says it’s one of the most affordable places from rooms, moguka to other things but cautions those who are used to ‘raw meat’
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“Halafu pale Mlolongo kuna joint inaitwa club 110. Hapo nje ni business ya moguka, miraa na kahawa. Ground floor is the main club, very beautiful with very nice music, some days of the week there’s strip dancing. Beer is pocket-friendly.
The first floor of that bar is a sister bar but I think the devil lives there. There are so many rooms made of iron sheets and all have been paid for by prostitutes. mostly are women from so many tribes but the majority are Kambas and Kikuyus as usual,” he wrote in part adding:

“As you know, all nunu don’t taste the same. The owner of room number two is a Giriama, room number seven is a Maasai and room 18 is a Chaga from TZ. My brother, ile utamu iko na hao nimetaja is out of this world. Any other drunkard who’s been with any of those prostitutes testifies at the counter mostly taking the last bottle before falling asleep.
The Chaga who lives in room number 18 is very pocket-friendly. She charges sh300 per shot time but I always pay her sh500. She’s got good quality condoms, HIV measuring kits and clean water to wash testicles. Huyo dem ukimuongeza kitu above the sh300, zile mazingaombwe anaezakufanyia, pengine utafikiria kuuza gari au shamba. In my case, ananioshaga makende then anaanza kulamba kutoka pale kwa base. I think you’ve seen that kwa makende kuna mahali hukaa nikama Mungu alipitisha cherahani akishona. I tell you that mtu akikulamba hiyo place unasikiaga thithi… wueh. 
Room number 73 kuna mwingine anaitwa Shiru. She is huge with hanging meat on the sides. (Hanging meat is commonly known as Wangeci syndrome, love handles or Kikuyu meat). Shiru doesn’t use condoms, she claims that she’s allergic. I have never tried her because of her size but friends say that if you f*ck her, you start seeing strange things. That even car number plates start looking like HIV 436B, STD 897A, DIE 562C etc….. even a simple name like TOM would read like TOMB.
Guy’s out there, usipewe pressure na dem wako if you have atleast 500 shillings. Come to Mlolongo. The indigenous akamba people call it “SOKO MUYO”.

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